Craig and I are equal partners in James’ diabetes care. And I do about 90 percent of the work related to caring for him. Can this juxtaposition be possible? Yes! And this is how I figure it.
I am fortunate to be home with James most of the day while his daddy has a job and a commute that takes him away from the home for most of the waking hours. As such, the tasks of giving insulin and testing usually fall to me. Also, most doctor appointments and lab visits fall during those same waking hours where it is just easier and makes more sense for me to be the one to make sure he gets where he needs to be.
What tasks are left over, and how does it become an “equal” thing? I think the reason that I don’t feel like I “do it all” is because the minute that Craig is home — the minute that he is in our presence — he immediately assumes at least equal responsibility for James. He’ll be the one to notice that he seems a little out of sorts and will test him without needing reminding. He’ll administer insulin or count carbs if he gives him anything to eat. He’ll participate in the checks at night and help set up software or other logging devices to track his blood sugar. Whenever we’re there together, Craig is at least as involved as I am. And I’m so grateful!
We find that equality for us is a mindset rather than a percentage. It is so nice to share what can amount to a bit of a burden with my husband who is more than willing to do anything that he physically can. That makes the daytime care that I provide — the numberless finger pricks and insulin sticks, carb counting, logging, etc. — all the more tolerable! Because I know unequivocally that he is in this with me and would do exactly what I’m doing if he were in my situation.
Disclaimer: The experiences and suggestions recounted in these articles are not intended as medical advice, and they are not necessarily the “typical” experiences of families with a child who has type 1 diabetes. These situations are unique to the families depicted. Families should check with their healthcare professionals regarding the treatment of type 1 diabetes and the frequency of blood glucose monitoring. Jen and Kim are real moms of kids with type 1 diabetes and have been compensated for their contributions to this site.